They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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