She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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