Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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