I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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