We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
