still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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