So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
What did we do last night that was yellow?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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