the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
