hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize