So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
