You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
