i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize