I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
