I am in a vortex of obligation.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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