Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
