My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
