So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
