I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
