I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
