Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
