had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
