my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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