so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
