So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
