dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
