it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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