The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
FUCK WHALES
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