You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize