East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
