dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
