Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Randomize
