i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
