Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
