Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
