yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
