I'm going to rape someone's good day.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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