i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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