dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
