That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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