Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
