allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
