The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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