I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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