Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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