Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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