You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
