why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.