He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
