i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Randomize
