I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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