Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
handjob tips. give me some.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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